“Are you telling me that no one checked during the interview process?”
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Transcript: How i Died Post S3 Bonus: License Revoked
This transcript is adapted from the episode’s original script, so the final audio may differ slightly.
INT. COURTOOM – DAY
[Jon's Defense Attorney squeaks across the floor, approaching the witness stand.]
Defense: And now please explain as simply as you can, how you came to identify the purple body killer.
Jon: I, uh, noticed some inconsistencies on the autopsy reports. So I pulled stored bodies to verify with their open cases, but the bodies were missing.
Defense: They were just… gone?
Jon: That's correct. I was trying to track down what happened to them, and no one seemed to know.
Defense: And you weren't involved in that at all, correct?
Jon: They were missing before I even started working there.
Defense: And then other bodies with similar injuries came into your morgue, correct?
Jon: Right. And once I was able to examine them, me and Sheriff Crowley started building a case against the purple body killer.
Defense: (laughing) Which is not you, safe to say.
Jon: It definitely wasn't. Unfortunately, the case never came to light due to what happened. But we got close to figuring everything out.
Defense: Thank you, doctor Spacer. No further questions.
[The defense sits down.]
Judge: Prosecution's witness.
[DA Grant pushes out his chair, rising. He walks toward the stand.]
Grant: Thank you, your honor. Now, mister Spacer —
Jon: It's doctor.
Grant: Excuse me?
Jon: I'm a doctor. Doctor… Spacer.
Grant: Are you still?
Defense: Objection.
Judge: Sustained. Get to the point, Grant.
Grant: My apologies your honor. I simply meant to clarify with doctor Spacer, his title.
Jon: I'm a forensic pathologist at Springfield General, working with the SPD.
Grant: Former pathologist, right?
[There's a beat.]
Judge: Answer the question doctor Spacer.
Jon: Right. Former pathologist.
[Grant paces around as he talks, confident in himself.]
Grant: Correct. And so circling back to my original question, do you still have your medical license?
Jon: No.
Grant: No. It was revoked, correct?
Jon: Correct.
Grant: And it was revoked after all of this purple body killer investigation fell through, or… am I wrong there?
[Jon fidgets in the seat.]
Jon: Can I take–
Judge: Answer the question.
Jon: My lawyer–
Grant: Your lawyer was required to share all information with the prosecution. And so I'll ask you again: When was your license revoked?
Judge: And may I remind you that you're under oath.
Jon: It was revoked in September…
[The crowd gasps. The judge hits the thingy with his gavel.]
Judge: Quiet down!
Grant: And just to clarify… When did you start your position at Springfield General?
Jon: May… 2019.
Grant: May 2019. Now, I'll be referring to you as mister Spacer. Unless you have any other problems with that…